Monday, August 12, 2013

A Heap of rats



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Monsieur comes home with a new sighting, a pile of 8 dead rats at the bottom of the street.  


We begin to speculate on what happened to these wayward rodents all in a pile beside the "poubelle"...not in the "poubelle" but meters away.  



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Theory #1:   A "clochard" cat is interviewing for a job and wants to impress someone enough to take him in.  


Theory #2:  Someone is poisoning rats and is not going to bury them...or wants the other rats to take notice so won't bury them. Of course, NIMBY applies and so they get dumped elsewhere. 


Theory #3:  Rats got together in a Jim Jones style version of the "rapture"....did the cool-aid acid test and failed or ...   Got beamed up to rat paradise?


Theory #4:  We have a maniac living on our street experimenting with ways to kill the neighbor's dog....or, perhaps,  the neighbor.  


Theory #5:   There was a "rat-nado".  Monsieur knows that there is a film called Shark-nado (though luckily he has been spared from seeing it.)   Maybe all of the rats were swept up in the last tornado and dumped as the storm got bored with itself.  


Theory # 6:  In an attempt to catch the rats, peanut butter was smeared on the inside of a trash can and when the rats fell in they were drowned by the perpetrator.     This is a real suggestion for how to catch rats from my friend Jody D.   Of course, as Jody points out there is always the choice of re-homing them elsewhere.   But who is going to carry the rat can to it's new homing site...tell me that.  

Well one thing is sure....rats are here to stay whether it is country or city and we have a little of both here on our street.  


 We had our own intruder.... rat or weasel... in the adjacent property recently.  We are the caretakers so Monsieur has put up enough grill work to tame a teenager's teeth.    It is two rows deep but with the unsheathed barbs on the outside.  That and the ammonia that smells like fox piss should discourage the lodgers.  


So far so good.  No more ominous sounds from the ceiling have been reported next door. ...  but I'll never know what happened to the hapless bevy down the road.


   Of course, it being August , they may stay there for a long time.   City services tend to center around the beaches in summer as crews get stretched because of the traditional August holiday.  Rats!


2 comments:

  1. Oh my God. Thanks for warning me!

    J.

    ReplyDelete
  2. At least you got rid of your varmint.

    Diane K.

    ReplyDelete